Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
