dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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