Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
True strength comes from lack of pants
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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