so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
