Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
