He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
