I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Randomize
