can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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