Pappa wants mamma naked
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
