I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
