We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
3pm strippers are depressing
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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