is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
