Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
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