if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
