in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 607 share tweet
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Randomize
