I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
