Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
last night I used snow as a chaser
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