Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Randomize
