dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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