i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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