i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
