I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
