Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Randomize
