So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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