if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
