And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
