There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
