HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
