If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
