when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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