office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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