This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I will pee on everything he values.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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