his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
