There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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