called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
She's like a pop up book from hell.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
