I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
