just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
honey bunches of taint.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
