It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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