Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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