im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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