Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
