so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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