ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
