dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
