Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I yelled at your uterus for you.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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