Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
