in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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