Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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