And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
