No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
