so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
